Wednesday, 27 February 2013

Circus Boy Over and Out

(Nicked from Baggage Reclaim)

In the end, and bearing in mind that I had by now chucked Circus Boy out in the early hours twice now, I DID text him a good luck message on Tuesday night last week. No reply, but I wasn't particularly bothered, cos there wouldn't have been much to say.

Wednesday we set off for Edinburgh quite early, and it is fair to say that during the journey my mind was with Circus Boy, wondering if he was managing the 20 mile charity unicycle ride ok. Son wasn't feeling too well on the way up, not sure what was wrong, but h was off his food, and when we got to the Premier Inn, he didn't want to do anything except settle in, watch TV then have an early tea in the on-site restaurant. By 6.30 he was in his bed, and I was watching DVDs on his laptop so as not to disturb him. HOWEVER, I had my phone on vibrate, right on my tummy, so as not to miss the call from Circus Boy, because I was excited to hear how he had got on, and also was by now planning wedding dresses, party favours and the like. Ok, so I wasn't really - I was actually planning fit sex on Saturday night, but that doesn't sound so romantic an may even slightly dull folks' sympathy, and I do like to play to the audience.

7pm came and went. As did 8pm and 9pm. By 9.30 I didn't know whether to be worried or annoyed. I sent a text saying, 'did you make it ok?' Note the lack of 'xx', which is my habitual text ending unless it is work. Friends who are reading, here is a little tip. If you have let me down and you get a text without even a single 'x', then you can assume I am royally pissed off with you. One 'x' meaning I am merely disappointed in you, and most of all you've let yourself down.

No reply. 10.30 came and went. So by now I am silently (so as not to awaken Son) apoplectic. IT'S JUST A FECKING TEXT! All that is required is a quick 'yes' or 'no' answer, I will assume you are celebrating your success and all will be well. Have to say, this really annoys me generally - when I send a text, or put a message on FB, and I know it's been seen and there's no reply. It's like talking to someone who just turns away and ignores you. Downright rude in my book.

So anyway, it of course occurred to me that he may be in hospital unconscious or in prison. In either of these cases, his phone would be off. So I called to see if it rang - and it DID! So NO EXCUSES, he was just completely ignoring me. So I fired off an arsey text: 'Wel since ur not in prison or hospital, it would appear that my suspicion that you only communicate wiv me wen u want something was correct. If u want something in future, just ask & please don't waste both our time with the pretending to be a friend thing.'

Thus satisfied, I fell asleep.

Next day Son was fully recovered and we had a brilliant day at Edinburgh Zoo, including seeing the pandas and watching their mating behaviour, and then we went to the sea at North Berwick. On the way back, my phone rang, but Son couldn't get it out of the back of the car fast enough. It was Circus Boy, but whereas usually I would have pulled over and phoned him back, I really couldn't be bothered. Instead, when we were back at the Premier Inn, I texted, 'sorry missed call, was driving.' He didn't respond in any way.

Friday we spent the whole day in Edinburgh, doing the bus tour, Our Dynamic Earth, and Edinburgh Castle (including the Honours of Scotland and the room where James VI and I was born). We also ate at my favourite Italian restaurant, Gordon's, which has gone upmarket in decor, but the food is exactly how I remembered it. 

Saturday we made really good time, and were home by lunchtime, so we watched a 'Miranda' marathon in the afternoon. I am a total convert.

Sunday night I had a text from Circus Boy 'what's got into you now? How am I a user?' Aaaah! Sending a provocative text are we?! Ha, that didn't work, I didn't even see it cos I had gone to bed, and I wouldn't have responded anyway.

Then last night he called, and again I didn't answer it (just imagined Heather Small singing 'what have you done today to make you feel proud?'). He can damn well bugger off, it's too late being over me like a particularly garrulous rash now. If he hadn't been so busy talking about himself the other night, he would have heard how being with Steve has made me look at my life and decide I'm tired of fake relationships, even friendships. Yes, I could treat him the way he treats me, and not reply to his texts or calls, then call him when I want something, but I'm not like that, and that isn't a friendship. In any case, people like that aren't interested in people who play them at their own game - they want soft-hearted forgiving people who let them get away with murder, just like I used to do. But no more. No drama, no arguments, but in future I will silently and deadlily (not really a word, but should be) remove the dead wood from the forest of my life. 


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